I think it’s safe to assume that everyone knows of someone who has been affected by divorce. I was privileged enough to grow up in a home where my parents remained married for the extent of my childhood. However, about six months after my own marriage my parents mutually agreed that they did not have much in common anymore and there lives had gone in directions different enough to merit dissolving the marriage. I knew my parents marriage wasn't perfect but I never expected that they would call it quits after 25+ years of marriage.
In regards to marriage the Lord taught, “But from the beginning of the creation of God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder” (Mark 10:6-9). The Lord made it clear of His exceptions of a married man and woman. I think cleaving goes both ways, just as a man needs to leave his mother and father and cleave unto his wife, the wife needs to do the same. She needs to be willing to cut the apron strings and stick by he side of her husband. A scriptural account of this is found in Moses. Because Eve partook of the fruit she would have to leave the Garden of Eden. This act would leave Adam alone, without a helpmeet in that garden. The Lord commanded Adam and Eve to remain together despite Eve’s choice. Thus setting the example of the need for us to work out the problems in our own marriage.
With that being said President Gordon B. Hinckley said, “There is now and again a legitimate cause for divorce. I am not one to say that it is never justified. But I say without hesitation that this plague amines us is not of God.” Elder Dallin H. Oaks commented on divorce saying, “Because of the hardness of our hearts, the Lord does not currently enforce the consequences of the celestial standard of marriage. He permits divorced persons to marry again.” In addition Elder Oaks taught that, “when a marriage is dead and beyond hope of resuscitation, it is needful to have a means to end it.” Can there be “just cause” to end a marriage, a temple covenant? If so, what is considered “just cause”?
Elder James E. Faust said, “In my opinion, any promise between a man and a woman incident to a marriage ceremony rises to the dignity of a covenant. Over a lifetime of dealing with humans problems, I have struggled to understand what might be considered “just cause” for breaking of covenants. I confess I do not claim the wisdom nor authority to definitely state what is “just cause.” Only the parties to the marriage can determine this. They must bear the responsibility for the train of consequences which inevitably follow if these covenants are not honored. In my opinion, “just cause” should be nothing less serious that a prolonged and apparently irredeemable relationship which is destructive of a person’s dignity as a human being.”
Non of us have the ability to judge a couples reason for divorce. However, if this is something you are seriously contemplating, I would suggest you seek help from professionals in trying to save your marriage. Which ever you decide, the implications of your choice can last for generations.
I do not have the authority or right to judge my parents decision to divorce. However, I know from a child’s standpoint the effect in can have on children, no matter the age. A covenant is not something to be taken lightly. Making and keeping the covenant comes with promised blessings. Breaking the covenant comes with promised consequences. May you be in a place worthy of receiving spiritual guidance on such decisions.
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